Last year was most definitely one of massive change for me; I moved house, my dad spent months seriously ill mostly in hospital and then died, I was made redundant for the third time from a job I loved and at a time when unemployment for people my age was rising each month and the relationship I had been in all of my adult life ended.
All of these things have completely changed the shape of my life forever and will carry on doing so for years to come I would imagine but it has also been the kick-up-the-bum I needed for me to take stock and decide what is most important to myself and what it is I really want from my life; a little hillside with my very own ‘hobbit hole’.
This want is something that has been forming for years now but something over the last year has just clicked and made me realise I can make it real and not just have it as an “if only…In a prefect world” dream.
I am a strong person and one of the things that makes me strong is the connection to the land I have. I feel most alive when I am out in *it*, cleaning out goat sheds, sowing seeds and watching the sky change. It is what I know and understand and when I am away from it I feel trapped and boxed in…
After my last redundancy I made some bad choices; I was so concerned with having a job I didn’t really consider the reason for working and told myself I could make it work. I was wrong and as a result the job/s I have had since November really haven’t been working, most weeks I worked six days a week and my only day off a week was as a result of me putting my foot down and even then that was often pushed with requests to work an extra shift; I am so much more than my job. I know it is possibly a thought that never even crossed others minds but I am a good carer* because of the me that I am away from work and working six days a week for not enough money doesn’t leave much room for this.
However this has hopefully now changed and a few weeks ago I started a new job which will hopefully give me some sort of balance between work and home life as well as enough income, and so long as I am careful some left over to put into savings towards my hillside. It does of course come with its down sides; a week on week off rota so I shall be away every other week but hopefully these weeks can be used to learn the skills I am going to need e.g. green building and living off grid and maybe even extra time to blog and share what I learn.
Lots of things are going to have to change; the way I garden and allotment, the animals I keep… Thankfully I have my mother and sister who are happy to look after what I already have whilst I am away but thoughts of more chickens or some quail will need to go on hold for the forseeable future. I am going to need to learn and apply more permaculture methods to growing and storing food and I have questions about what to do about seed sowing next spring if I am going to be away. Growing in pots isn’t going to work as well as it did last year but it is all do able and feels like I might just be moving forward at long last.
*and this isn’t just me being big-headed about myself it is what I have been told by both my employers and something I believe when I have seen the way some others work
It all sounds very exciting – change is always scarey but you sound determined – good luck with all your plans.
I found so much to relate to in this post, thanx. Especially about the outdoors and nature being your source of healing & only really feeling happy outside.
very best wishes with your new job and your plans Sammie x♥
There is so much I relate to in this post, especially about the therapeutic qualities in nature and the outdoors.. and only really feeling happy out of doors. I’d so love to have chickens and goats… I’ve been dreaming about it a lot lately.
best wishes, Sammiex♥
I willlook forward to seeing your plans come to fruition keep it up
Hi Poppy, what a dreadful year but it sounds like you’re strong enough to take it in your stride and keep looking forward. I really admire your focus on moving toward the lifestyle you want and wish you every success with it. I hope you’ll keep blogging, you’re moving towards a lifestyle that I’d love eventually and your determination is inspiring. Very best wishes.
I hadn’t realised you had dealt with somuch this year, I love that you are being positive despite it all
The hobbit house sounds great and am sure you will make it a reality
Hope your work life balance is still good?
Meant to add I love Simon Dale’s hobbit house
I am sure you already know about it but just in case:
I love his house too. There are so many amazing buildings made using sustainable methods once you start looking